Through a Naturist Lens

One thing that the political world is demonstrating with a vengeance is that what one person sees as good, another person sees with an opposite point of view. Though not currently in the crosshairs of the majority, nudity is a good example of how humanity is polarised with regards to the nude human body. I see simple nudity as good. Others who have internal alarms go off when seeing a nude human, don’t. For them, for a variety of reasons, nudity is “not” good.

I see nudity and experience as a pleasurable state while at the same time, I don’t find wearing clothing to be “bad.” I guess one could say that I am pragmatic when it comes to wearing clothing and being clothing free. There is no good vs evil visceral response for me. Perhaps it has something to do with living in a temperate climatic zone where mother nature has well defined seasons with temperatures alternating between -40 and +40 Celsius.

Despite what I think and believe, there are people in my orbit who would be shocked should they ever see me naked, people who would though they may have seen me in a positive light for decades, wouldn’t hesitate to call the police and have them deal with the pervert who is a threat.

“Good and evil are opposite poles of a moral judgment which, as such, originates in man [a human]. A judgment can be made about a thing only if its opposite is equally real and possible.” – Carl Jung

Naturists are well aware that good and evil have nothing to do with nudity or clothing. Good people do exist who are repelled by nudity. Good people exist who don’t care one way or the other, and good people exist who struggle with clothing. The same can be said with “Not Good” people. They exist in the same groupings. Accepting this reality, I then turn to what Jung said about good and evil – there are about moral judgments and actions based on these moral judgments.

An example of this that is currently causing societal reaction, is the right of a woman to choose what happens with regards to a fetus. The prochoice and anti-abortion polarity begins with a personal judgment. And that, is okay as it is a personal response. However, when that judgment becomes a trigger for a significant sector of society, then bad things happen. The more the scales are tilted in one direction, the worse things get until they reach a point of real evil.

The women in Texas, USA, have just been legally declared criminals of the highest order should they abort a fetus that has passed six weeks of existence. Two Canadian provinces are making access to abortions very difficult. And a major political party is predominantly in favour of following the example in Texas.

The problem with any group getting extraordinary power, is the likelihood that the issues they view through a fundamentalist lens are very likely to become laws that punish. All those who hold an apposing view are enemies and are evil.

I have to admit that I’m not in the best of moods today as I sit here at the computer. The world around me is going crazy. In Texas abortions have once again become illegal with penalties that are stricter than what exist for terrorists – Wade-Roe had been overturned. Likely most other Republican states will soon follow. In Canada the newly elected provincial government has fired the complete Department of Health, that same group that had the best defensive response record in the country for Covid19.

Nationally, the Federal election is being covered by media with the intent on demonising the Prime Minister. Photos of him being hung, death threats, a group of American Patriots are following the Prime Minister around Canada to rile up and interfere with any public meeting [with the exception of in Quebec – an issue for the Patriots – where the language is French].

That said, this post isn’t really about the insanity that is running amok in the outer world. As Carl Jung once put it, “for in the self good and evil are indeed closer than identical twins.” It is something we all wrestle with, trying hard to be our best self. It is hard work, for it takes only a moment, a slim crack in our armour for our worst self to emerge and cause havoc. Yet, too many of us take that battle to the outer world and act out these two aspects of ourselves.

We self-identify with the white hats and project the darkness onto others who hold opposite views. Good versus evil not dealt with as an inner “self” problem, becomes a world problem. Balance gets lost within and without. That lack of balance within is the root cause of most mental-health issues. We internalise “shame” for what we know is wrong with us, and express it outward in anger, fear, and hate.

As the outer world is presented with more and more nudity, one is deluded if one thinks that normalising nudity will be the end result. Human consciousness doesn’t work that way. The motivations for being clothing free within the normalising-nudity community aren’t built on balance. All the prejudices, the us vs them, are alive and well. The us vs them dynamic exists within the community itself though we are loathe to admit it. Rather than deal with the problems, they are projected onto the rest of society.

Personally, I am leery about groups, about collectives. I find that to fit in, I need to basically stop being myself authentically. I need to put on a persona that will allow me to enter into the collective. Going without clothing is often the same thing. We shed clothing to fit in with a group. Sometimes it is a compulsory thing such as a naturist club , sometimes it is to take a dare to fit in with a crowd [I did this in middle school when challenged to go skinny dipping in a prairie dugout], and sometimes it is to ease the tensions in a relationship with a partner who is a nudist/naturist. Of course, the opposite is more often the norm, wearing clothing to fit in, to belong to a group, to ease tensions.

In the end, it becomes a question that is tied to one’s solitary being. If all things are equal, is one nude or not? Even then, there are environmental factors that often makes decisions for an individual. I am clothing free as often as possible. When someone other than my wife makes an appearance in our home or yard, I wear clothing. Yet, when it is cold and windy outside, even if I am alone, I find myself putting on clothing to stay warm. In the house? Alone? Then, I am clothing free … unless the house is too cold – think of a prairie winter.

So what does any of this have to do with good and evil? Nudity in itself is a battleground. The collectives in one’s life determine, for the most part, that nudity is bad, evil is bad, nudity outside of the bedroom between a married heterosexual couple – preferably white – is bad. Laws are made, Church doctrine is entrenched, nudity is determined to be sinful and evil. If one attacks all that is nude, one is on the side of goodness. If one dares to be nude, even as a solitary event, then one becomes the enemy to be targeted and punished.

And to return to Jung’s words: “there is absolutely no truth that does not spell salvation to one person and damnation to another. All universalisms get stuck in this terrible dilemma.”

Yes, the sun has returned, and with it, warmer temperatures. It appears that we will have at least four days of somewhat summer sunshine and temperatures before it cools down again. It’s already 17 C. as I write up this post, and it is supposed to get to 25 C. by mid afternoon. I will soak in as much Vitamin D accordingly.

On a different topic, in two days, I celebrate 50 years of marriage with an incredible woman. Luckily, we are both in good health – physical and mental health. With the grace of the gods and goddesses, we may yet have a decade or two of life worth living ahead of us. So how did this happen? I mean, we were strangers from different parts of the country when we met. I proposed the same day I met her and she accepted. A year, less a week, later we got married. A city boy and a country girl somehow “fit” and that was the beginning.

We are different, not just in terms of biology, but in many ways. I have an INFP personality and she has an ESTJ personality – thing of fire and water, with me being the water [Cancer astrological sign]. I am a naturist, or at least a man who is more comfortable out of his clothing, and she is “normal” in today’s world and likes clothing.

The tie that binds us is not legal or social, it is something much deeper than that. Like all couples, we reach the breaking point time and time again, but somehow pull back at the last minute. What ever it was that brought us together is determined that we stay together despite common sense.

And now, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I can’t believe it has been so long since my last post. As expected, my site stats have taken a hit with nothing new to read. However, life isn’t about visitor statistics to a blog site. With Covid taking a bit of a break [it is gathering up steam again] and with my wife and I and all of our children and grandchildren over the age of twelve, our time has been fruitfully spent . Truth be told, I enjoyed my time away from the keyboard.

Now, with a space of time than has opened up, the pull to write here has surfaced. Other than short visits in the near future with two sets of extended family, there is nothing on my agenda for the next two weeks. From that point on, it looks like an extended five weeks of activity might once again limit my presence here. It is amazing how much Covid has become an agent for having a person spend more time in the face-to-face world when opportunities for gathering come to the surface.

It seems that now I have finished the revisions requested by Ted Bun and Will Forest for the Holiday in the Nudist Colony Anthology. The story is one of many included in the anthology that will be available later this autumn. I am using my pseudonym, René Beauchemin, for the story. It is part of my shifting all of my naturist works to the authorship of René Beauchemin. For example, A Small Company of Pilgrims has been retitled The Half Naked Pilgrim. This will create needed separation between the naturist and non-naturist works that exist, and any future works that I create.

Most naturist fiction authors use pseudonyms for a variety of reasons. This is my one and only reason – a clear separation that keeps my readers foremost in my mind. My family knows I write naturist fiction, so that isn’t a factor. They also know I am a naturist, so there is nothing there to hide as well. Of course there is a cost to this – I can’t import all the ratings and reviews for the new versions based on author’s name and book title. But then again, perhaps that doesn’t matter. After all, there are so many more readers out there who might weigh in with their words and opinions.

It’s that time of year when the garden begins to produce food. This morning I picked the first batch of green beans, enough for a meal this evening. Then, I clipped off a few dead branches from the crab apple tree. I enjoy these kind of tasks, especially since I don’t have to get dressed to do them.

Earlier this week, I went for another seven and a half kilometre nude hike in the hills as it will likely be my last opportunity to do this type of hiking for almost two weeks. Also headed to the sidelines will be my taking time in the afternoons for some sunbathing. I have my three youngest grandchildren coming to my house. The two youngest will stay for two days with their father, then only the eldest of the three will stay for another week at our place with his friend. A lot of activities are planned so that they will leave with positive memories. My life isn’t all about nudity.

I have just watched a six part series called the Making of a Tyrant. Though the series was focused on infamous tyrants in our relatively recent past, the series highlighted the concept of tyrant that could extend to very small circles such as families, social groups, and modern political parties. The first program is about Hitler and the last one is about Kim Jong-un. However, the tyrants studied are more about illustrating concepts than about the men themselves – and yes, they are all men.

The issue is control and how determined people will do anything to keep control or punish those who refuse to be controlled. I strongly advise each of my readers here to watch this series, if possible. I don’t want to get into modern day politics other than to say that the issues and conditions and the intentions still exist in today’s modern world. I do simply ask that you think about our world through a wide-awake lens.

Now back to the grandchildren. We have a trip to a water park, backyard adventures, a trip to a First Nations archeological site that was once a buffalo jump, a couple of rounds of golfing with the eldest of the three and his best friend with whom I have done most of my golfing over the past two years, time in the local swimming pool, and free time for their technology. Hiking and a BBQ are also on the agenda – but not nude hiking, obviously. It should be a good time with grandchildren.

It’s my birthday and I am now seventy-two years old. I am fortunate to have good health though I would like to have more control of my life. My body and mind mind are rebels with wills of their own. My muse is very fickle of maintaining control of my creative efforts. My ego is stubborn and too often asserts that he is in charge of everything. Lordy, what a mess.

Who is in control of whom. It’s a topic that has spurred many discussions in my own home, especially about my nudity. However, the subject is not just about nudists or naturists and the images they post on various social media platforms. It is also at the heart of all relationships beginning with a parent and child.

I see this all too vividly with my grandchildren who span the ages of 2 to 25. The first instance comes when an infant shows resistance or outright refusal. No one is immune to the issue of control. Now, with that said, I want to return to the issue of control as it affects naturists and nudists, or people who just plain want to shed their clothing without being labelled.

My wife has asked me not to share images of her. And, so I don’t. It is as simple as that. She has also asked that I don’t share images of myself on social media sites where family and friends are connected to me. The requests are reasonable though didn’t have to be made as I had no intention of posting images on these sites – and as an aside, those sites wouldn’t permit such images to be posted regardless.

So, is this an issue of control? She has never told me not to post photos though I know that if she had her way there would be no such posting, let alone photos taken to be posted. And, it isn’t that she gives permission or allows me to take my photos or post the odd one here and there. I give myself permission. And that, is a key factor in getting and keeping control of one’s own identity.

You know that you are in a toxic relationship when someone uses the relationship and threats of ending the relationship, or at the least their extreme disappointment and displeasure, to control who posts what on social media. “Don’t post photos of your _______!” – fill in the blank.

The pressure to go full frontal, or to avoid full frontal by a significant other can overwhelm when one feels that their relationship will come to an end otherwise. For too many, the threat of ending a relationship will have them walk on eggshells around their partner.

For a naturist/nudist/whatever to have their significant other who is also a nude, to take control [or want to control] one’s nude experiences and expression is confusing at the least. Removing clothing is about embracing freedom and claiming self-ownership. Self-concept grows into self-confidence. However for some, the focus on “Self” slips into narcissism where the partner is a subset in the relationship. The best response is to reclaim self-ownership. Clinging to dependency on the other at the cost to self-esteem is a recipe for anxiety, depression, and loss of self.

I know, it is easier said than done, especially for those who have invested decades into a relationship with children and perhaps even grandchildren in the picture. Yet, I do know that the self shrivels and dies inside when everything revolves around the power and whims of the partner. The response to a controlling other is to reclaim control over self. The attempt to turn the tables and control the other is not a healthy response.

So, where does that leave a person when the healthiest thing to do is to walk away, close the door to the controlling other? “Do I or don’t I?” My response, inform the “other” of the new boundaries regarding control. There is a chance that the “other” will hear and believe and thus provide a path forward for the relationship. However, for most such situations, the response is closure. Closing the door to the old relationship allows a new door to open. A word of caution, that primary new relationship needs to be about rebuilding the relationship with self, not grasping for a new “other.”

Time is needed.

Today is the start of another round of 30+ Celsius temperatures here on the Canadian prairies. The forecast is for at least 11 days of such temperatures with the other three days pegged at 29 C to round out the next two weeks. So far, it might be safe to say that we have had more 30+ daytime highs in 2021 than I have experienced here in the past twenty years.

One of the fallouts of so many hot days is that I am walking less distance than usual, especially since strong winds have been a norm here as well for the past few months. I had thought I would go out later this afternoon for a naturist walk in the hills since I only did a short 8 km walk this morning. However, it is now cancelled, perhaps a good thing as I am finding the time to write here.

I am a writer. At least that is what I tell myself and what others around me would say about me as well. Yet for the past number of weeks, I haven’t done all that much writing so far this summer. I find myself stepping away from my computer and spending more time outdoors in my garden while I can. Autumn and winter will come and with it the impulse to write more. My current work-in-progress is a “feel-good” book that tells the tale of fifty years of marriage – my marriage.

The book does not pretend to tell the whole story but it does tell a real story. Not all stories need to expose warts and stains and the sins of self and other. Because it is sticking with the narrative of movement – a life-long pilgrimage of two people somehow bonded together despite being opposites [I’m INFP and she is ESTJ]. Since I don’t have to create characters or a plot line, it becomes a simple matter of gleaning the highlights over fifty years of relationship, especially those highlights that have us journeying from one place to the other.

The idea is to finish the book in another six weeks. Ideally, I was going to create a book of about 25,000 words with photos illustrating each period. So far I have 41,000 words with about one chapter left to write. I checked with Amazon and found that the maximum file size for uploading is about 650MB. I hope to keep this book under 500MB. If this becomes impossible, I have another option where I build the book online via Blurb.Ca / Blurb.Com which I used for my Jungian Psychology booklets. The book is to be our gift to our children and grandchildren. I will make it available for sale at some point after they have their print copies of the book.

Now, for the questions that must surely be out there, especially how did we manage to do this … well the truth is, it just happened. We are both very stubborn people and don’t want to fail at things. It hasn’t been easy. It never is easy when a person has to somehow accommodate another person into their space where control becomes the dominant issue. Everyone wants to be their unique self. Everyone wants to feel independent and strong. Yet somehow, there is always a need for the other to meet one’s needs, and to meet the needs of one’s partner which results in both becoming dependent upon the other.

There is no advice to be given. Every journey of relationship is unique. I watch my children engaged in their journeys of relationship, seeing the storms and the calm waters. Will they hold together? Should they hold together? I don’t have the answers. I do, however, hope that they remain true to themselves on their journeys.

What about your journey? Even if there is no “other” there is the “self” journey that also demands being true to yourself. This isn’t about narcissism. It is about self-realisation.

It’s Canada Day and it is gloriously sunny out, very hot, and very windy. With our neighbours from two doors down out of town, the woman who often makes a surprise appearance when my wife is at work and I am either outdoors or indoors while nude, my wife is more relaxed with my outdoor nudity. My nudity is a stressor for her. She wants more control to limit my nudity, and I want more control about when and where I can be clothing free.

All of us suffer from issues of control. Who or what we try to control as well as who or what outside of us is trying to control us. Before I go on with this topic, I want to state that this issue of control includes “self” control, but not necessarily with the meaning that is generally assumed for self-control which is more about caving in to the societal controls as though we are policing ourselves. This has nothing to do with Naturism. This is universal where there is more than one person in the picture. With that said, this blog post will focus on naturism or nudism or just plain “not wearing clothing.”

For starters, nudity-nakedness comes with a gut level response, some of it understandable and most of it coming from the unconscious aspect of one’s self. Positive or negative, we all have a visceral response. Many in the naturist community don’t get this as they assume that once a person tries naturism, they will be positively impressed and be converted. This is very naïve thinking. Some people try over and over again but still can’t get past the negative gut responses that often shows up as physical responses similar to an allergic response.

We all have a history that works as a powerful inhibitor. Not everyone is able to break through that embedded psychological imprint. With effort they can accept that it is okay for others, but it “just isn’t right” for them. There is no judgement call demanding others keep their clothing on. “Self” control is about trying to find one’s path through these psychic restrictions.

The other face of “self” control is how we get conditioned by the larger society, and in particular, the micro societies in which we live, including work, family, and community. Societal codes depend on individuals policing themselves to keep societal norms in place. The restrictive scripts are echoes of our parents, extended family, community, religious faith, and other sources of outer authority. There is little thinking involved, we simply obey the unwritten codes that were embedded during our formative years.

Now, when one enters into a relationship with a significant other, a new dance of control ensues. The control can be overt with one dominating the other, usually not a loving form of control. The control is enacted with the intent of moulding the “other” into a prescribed image of what is believed to be the best kind of partner. Resistance to changing to fit into the mould is viewed as stubbornness. “If you loved me, you’d …” is a more passive form of exerting control.

Many naturists are familiar with this phrase which is usually spoken to lessen the incidences of nudity by their partner. Somehow, being nude is seen and understood, perhaps even believed to be about the other person. Control of the naturist is essential for the “other” to remain at the centre. It isn’t about love regardless of the words spoken.

“No one wants to see you nude. If you loved me you’d wear clothes and be happy wearing them.”

“There’s no way that I can feel sexually stimulated when you’re naked all the time. Wear clothes and you’ll be more sexually attractive to me.”

“Your nudity is having people shun me and afraid to come over to our house.”

The list goes on and on. But it doesn’t stop there. Two naturists in a significant relationship also face issues of control. It takes a huge effort to lose the compulsion to control the other. Fear is at the root of the problem. “What if …?”

In the comments below, feel free to talk about how you are both victim and controller in your life. I am listening. Contradict me, teach me, affirm my words – your choice. Or, simply remain silent, again your choice.

My life and your life are journeys. Regardless of whether or not we are wearing clothing, the core of who we are beneath any camouflage, is a naked self. That is the centre. Anything that we might grasp at and seek to possess doesn’t erase the truth that possessions are not significant for the journey. Our experiences, the stuff that we often try to concretise with photographs, have one purpose. They serve to allow our psyche to become better aware of oneself.

The scene in my photo shows the wall of photographs that shows the “wanderings” of the last fifteen years. It’s impressive in terms of a scorecard, if that is important. However for me, it is more of an invitation to go in search of those places not yet experienced, more like a jigsaw puzzle with missing pieces. The hallway is symbolic of the journey, the corridor through time with a light at the end which invites one to enter the light and be at home. I have turned away from the light that would signal an end to the journey. I am not ready. There is so much more of the world to see, so many people with whom I might have a chance encounter that would allow me to discover more of the mystery of my own being, let alone the mystery of who they are.

As much as we might try to deny it, each of us is at the centre of the universe. We can’t escape being at the centre though we may try desperately to stand at the sidelines and let the light of others shine brightly, denying our own light. Our individual journey doesn’t have an end that has a certificate issued at the end like some sort of report card and final evaluation. There is only the endless journey of experiences with others, the environment, and our hidden selves. Fear, love, doubt, anger, joy, indifference, pain, ecstasy – all of it touches something deep within and uncovers a bit more of what we don’t know about ourselves, even if we are not fully conscious yet of what that is. We are bigger that we know.

How we view others is a mirror of what we deny about ourselves. We deny most of ourselves, the good, the bad, the beautiful and the ugly. Unconsciously our unknown self is projected. If there is any feeling response to another person, something inside of us has been activated. We get angry at some abuse committed by another person and vilify that person. We stand up taller and righteously as better when in truth, that same darkness lies within each of us. There is no atrocity that our unknown inner self is capable of committing. And the same goes for when we adore others. They appear to be what we wish we could be as we then push ourselves downwards as lesser. Yet, that inner self has that same aspect. We would not recognise any way of being if it wasn’t already encoded within us as a part of our self.

The journey of life isn’t about escaping darkness in a quest of perfection. It is about stripping down to the basic core of who we are and accepting, unconditionally the truth of who we are. We are all perpetually hungry, a hunger that no food or drink has ever been able to satiate. We are hungry for knowing who we are beneath our clothing and our limited awareness of self.

Nudity and sexuality. I know that many, many people are loathe to put the words nudity and sexual together. If this were about religion, that would be a mortal sin, one that would condemn one to the deepest pits of whatever hell one could imagine. Now, one of these states doesn’t automatically assume the other. After all, just being clothing free doesn’t mean that there is a sexual desire or sexual intent. It might simply mean just being naked.

There is nothing simple about it as our minds are complex things. For example, we all change our clothing which necessitates the removal of all clothing and then replacing the items with more clothing. That moment when we are in between … at that moment we are naked, nude … and there is little question that is unlikely to be taken as a sexual act or sexual provocation.

However, even that is not so cut and dried. Human minds are, as I said, complex. What any of us thinks while in the in between zone is also a factor. At times, there is an “intent” in the choice of clothing that turns the scene into a sexual experience.

Another scene, a person in a shower. Washing. It’s pretty mundane and purposeful. However, sometimes the streams of water awaken something, even if momentarily, to remind a person that they are sexually alive, a delicious feeling. And then it fades as the business of washing up continues.

The point is, we are sexual beings. We have an innate need for connection with others, even if that need is barely registering on the radar. Curiously, the person who is most involved in this whole business of sexuality is the self.

Still, that isn’t to say much of anything. If there was no viewer, it doesn’t change anything … or does it? Is it about the viewer or about the photographer or the subject of the image [often one and the same person]. Despite all of this, I have no doubts that the image and the intent has a sexual impulse, a revelling in one’s own sexuality.

That’s okay. After all, we are sexual beings. We all have some libido, even if it barely registers in our opinion. It has nothing to do with our belief systems or our intentions. Whether or not there is nudity involved is irrelevant. People fall in love, lust, and misbehave when the object of their attention is clothed.

In fact, what we buy to wear accentuates the natural sexual needs at a subconscious level. We make a ourselves handsome or beautiful without thinking about it. Yet, we as a society, are blind to what we do and why we do it. Rather, we project our stuff on others and blame them. Our desires and our needs are there whether there is nudity or not.

As for myself, I don’t pretend that I don’t find myself drawn to certain women. In my world, there is little to no chance that I would ever see other women naked, and that is okay. This sense of being drawn to someone does not give me permission to act on that. It does, however, give me something to think about regarding myself. With all of that said, what do you think? Agree? Disagree?