Today is the start of another round of 30+ Celsius temperatures here on the Canadian prairies. The forecast is for at least 11 days of such temperatures with the other three days pegged at 29 C to round out the next two weeks. So far, it might be safe to say that we have had more 30+ daytime highs in 2021 than I have experienced here in the past twenty years.
One of the fallouts of so many hot days is that I am walking less distance than usual, especially since strong winds have been a norm here as well for the past few months. I had thought I would go out later this afternoon for a naturist walk in the hills since I only did a short 8 km walk this morning. However, it is now cancelled, perhaps a good thing as I am finding the time to write here.
I am a writer. At least that is what I tell myself and what others around me would say about me as well. Yet for the past number of weeks, I haven’t done all that much writing so far this summer. I find myself stepping away from my computer and spending more time outdoors in my garden while I can. Autumn and winter will come and with it the impulse to write more. My current work-in-progress is a “feel-good” book that tells the tale of fifty years of marriage – my marriage.
The book does not pretend to tell the whole story but it does tell a real story. Not all stories need to expose warts and stains and the sins of self and other. Because it is sticking with the narrative of movement – a life-long pilgrimage of two people somehow bonded together despite being opposites [I’m INFP and she is ESTJ]. Since I don’t have to create characters or a plot line, it becomes a simple matter of gleaning the highlights over fifty years of relationship, especially those highlights that have us journeying from one place to the other.
The idea is to finish the book in another six weeks. Ideally, I was going to create a book of about 25,000 words with photos illustrating each period. So far I have 41,000 words with about one chapter left to write. I checked with Amazon and found that the maximum file size for uploading is about 650MB. I hope to keep this book under 500MB. If this becomes impossible, I have another option where I build the book online via Blurb.Ca / Blurb.Com which I used for my Jungian Psychology booklets. The book is to be our gift to our children and grandchildren. I will make it available for sale at some point after they have their print copies of the book.
Now, for the questions that must surely be out there, especially how did we manage to do this … well the truth is, it just happened. We are both very stubborn people and don’t want to fail at things. It hasn’t been easy. It never is easy when a person has to somehow accommodate another person into their space where control becomes the dominant issue. Everyone wants to be their unique self. Everyone wants to feel independent and strong. Yet somehow, there is always a need for the other to meet one’s needs, and to meet the needs of one’s partner which results in both becoming dependent upon the other.
There is no advice to be given. Every journey of relationship is unique. I watch my children engaged in their journeys of relationship, seeing the storms and the calm waters. Will they hold together? Should they hold together? I don’t have the answers. I do, however, hope that they remain true to themselves on their journeys.
What about your journey? Even if there is no “other” there is the “self” journey that also demands being true to yourself. This isn’t about narcissism. It is about self-realisation.